Sunday, March 27, 2011

The working weekend at Genting

This weekend is my 1st working weekend at Genting.
Actually is a relax and easy manage job task,
i guess the tough part is how to spend the few hours in between the 1st and 2nd performance. LOL
Today, we have no more room to stay in and now sitting at Mc D,
spending our free time, listening to the screaming from Theme park,
looking at those peoples who same as us,
no way to go and sitting here to online and wait for time.

There are some feeling that i experience yesterday and it was so familiar to me.
Has been a long time i never walk around Genting by my own.
There are few different kind of feeling attacked me.
Calm because i'm alone and nobody knows me.
Cold and refreshing because of the weather and air up here.
Lonely, because there are no beloved with me.
Missing, because i'm consider away from the usual place i was.

I do really miss some kind of feeling, especially during midnite after the show and we walking back to our hotel room.
Windy night, but no one holding my hand & can't rely on a strong arm.
Walking in the cold air but there is no one hugging me from the back,
or no one wrapping the hand around my shoulder.
There is no one try to make my hand warm when it freezing cold.
This is the feeling i got when you are not around.
Not that i can't be alone or independent.
But just that i feel glad to have this kind of feeling towards you.
It's proof to me that you are important to me,
and i do really love you in every minutes and seconds.
You might not have the same feeling or you might have,
but i appreciate the time we have.

Looking at the clock, tickling slowly...
Try to get my eye sight out of my lappy,
guess what i saw?
Karen Tann with bored face sitting in front of me do nothing.
Oh my gosh, we are just don't know what else to do here.
She playing with her iphone 4 and i SWEAR i will get my HTC incredible S... One day .. LOL

Time oh time... my heart is like locking in a cage,
Desperate for seeing your face, talking to you and feel you with touching the precious face that i love so much.
What will my future lead me to?
How far can we go and how much time we still left?
I will try my best to treasure every second ...
I Love You... Yes, I do... =)

Sunday, March 13, 2011

My Sunday ~

Is a sunny Sunday...
Guess most of the liverpool fans already in Bukit Jalil,
waiting to see the legend players in the game.

Sunday is still a Sunday.
Family day. Shopping day. Gathering. Outing with friends and others.
Shopping malls are just peak and everyone fighting for car park as well.
This is the life in City.

Sometimes i do really enjoy the life in smaller town.
With more green and the people with more humanity.
Missing those places that can really relax, chill and calm.
Even back to my hometown, i will feel better.
Yes, no doubt, Seremban not much entertainment,
maybe is boring for some of you.
But for me, it's just nice.
Even though got nothing much can do in Seremban,
but i guess stay home is just another way of enjoy for me.

Suppose to do grocery shopping today,
but just lazy to be sardine with the rest.
Maybe dinner time will be the best.
At this moment, i do nothing.
But don't get me wrong,
i'm not complaining boring to stay home.
I just enjoy the quietness,
putting on the headphone,
listening to my usual emo music,
but yet i still can hear the noise from that table fan
and.........
snoring !!!

I think the best for me is when i turn around,
see the naive, stress free kiddish sleeping face...
Guess the most naive face is when fall as sleep.
When you look at the one you love when they are as sleep,
will you feel like pamper them,kiss on the cheek
and feel the sweetness of just look at the face?
Have you experience the same thing with me?

I guess the feeling depends on person as well.
What you feel when you look at your parent's sleeping face?
Yes, still quiet and calm.
But there are some other feeling that make me sad and heart ache.
Their face just full of wrinkles which drew by the life path...
caused by the worries and hardwork on bringing us up.
But what have you returns them?
More heart ache and worries?
I trying very hard to give my mom whatever i can.
Unfortunately the only thing she wanted and i can't fulfill her is...
she want me to stay together at Seremban.
Hopefully i can get a house and make her stay with me no matter where.
At least she can see me everyday,
crossing my life and not like now.
But i knew she will not want to stay with me... =)

Sometimes human is just complicated.
We want everything.
Everyone is just greedy to have everything, included
happy marriage or love life, but at the same time,
we want our career as well.
How about your family? We wish to spend time with family as well.
Human just complicated.
If i could make a wish,
i guess i just want to be a simple woman,
who have a simple life, have a job to get income for living.
Cooking at home for family after work.
Chit Chat with the family and the love one after dinner.
Have some memorable trip.
Simple yet meaningful.
I guess this is what i really wish to have.
What about you?
Try to empty yourself and have a think.
It could be a good way to find yourself from lost. =)

Saturday, March 5, 2011

如何衡量爱?

爱,如何去衡量?
有的人会说,他们爱他的另一半比较多。
有的人却说,他们的另一半爱他们较多。
到底哪一个情况会较幸福呢?
很多人在这样的问和想。

其实啊,很多人都很享受爱的过程。
其实,不管是你爱着他,或他爱着你,
谁爱谁比较多,其实能爱上一个人,可以相爱,
不就已经是一种幸福了吗?

能为你爱的人而努力、付出,你不觉得开心吗?
当你爱上了,
很自然的,你会想为他分担、一起努力、为他付出,
让他充满着笑容和欢乐。
看到这一些,你不就已经很满足和开心了吗?

既然你决定了去爱他,就不要计较。
可能有时候很难办到吧。
可是,当你想想。。。
你和他一起经过的日子里,
你为他付出和做了些什么,你真的还能记得吗?
因为我们从心里全心全意的付出,而不是期望回报。
既然这样,你又怎么还算的了呢?

可是,他为你所做的事其实你都知道。
可是人啊,有时候总会不自觉的想要更多。
回想起来,其实是否自己开始贪心,
而忘了他所为你做过的事呢?

有的人,因为他们有条件选择,
他们开始衡量谁会为他们付出较多。
想想这一切,如果你不爱那个人,
他能为你付出一切,甚至生命。
你觉得你选了和他一起,但并不是因为爱。。
你会幸福吗?

人啊都是感情动物,都是感性的。。。
很多人因为适应了或习惯了那种生活,
就算他们明白这不是他们要的,
可是他们却走不出那个习惯的圈子。害怕去改变
不止发生在感情,
其实在工作上,我可就是一个好例子。。。

其实,本人很喜欢王菲的执迷不悔。。
还记得有几句歌词很有意思。。
‘这一次我执着面对,任性的沉醉,
我并不在乎,这是错还是对。
别说我应该放弃,应该睁开眼。
我用我的心,去看、去感觉。
你并不是我,又怎能了解。’
有些事情啊,真的没人比你自己清楚,
你爱的是谁,你有多爱他,
这一切一切,都只有你自己最清楚。

爱上你,我从不后悔。
伤了你,我心痛不已。
看见你,我人似喝醉。
抱着你,我感到安全。
轻吻你,我像在梦里。
牵着你,我倍加自信。
因为还有很多很多的一切,
所以我每天都在努力的爱你一天比一天多,
希望有一天我们可以。。。
爱到老,我的痴人梦。。。

Friday, March 4, 2011

The happiness behind the shame

It was a very tired night and the rain makes me feel extra tired.
Was looking around at the shop lots...
deciding what to eat for dinner.
and we passing by this western restaurant with a guy standing outside of the door.
He try to greet everyone passing by,
just to hopes someone will dine in.
Sometimes certain job is just a bit tough...

When i done with my vegetarian dinner at few doors away from the western restaurant,
we passing by the restaurant again.
But this time is not that guy anymore...
This guy bit shorter compare to earlier one.
He seems a bit uncomfortable when i look at him.
He just feel shame to stand in front of the door but yet... is a part of his job.

His first reaction was avoid my eye sight,
use one of his hand to cover part of his face.
Actually there are a lot of job that you have to overcome the shame you feel.
You need to work for your living.
There are alot of the people have to be thick face or poker face to get their job done.
Sometimes they might loss their friend, or even their pride...
But there are always one thing that we sacrificed and to get what we want.

You will never know what is behind the story.
The guy who shame of his job,
he might enjoy nice dinner with his family when he get his paid.
He might able to send his children to school and see them happy with the study.
You never know what is in return.

Life is just full of surprise and unpredictable...
It might be good and bad at the same times.
Just depends how you want your life to be.
Appreciate the thing you have and you still can hold it now,
no regret when it no longer yours.
But human just greedy... They will hope to have it forever.
Just like me, i do hope the love towards me is forever and ever...